UCL Lost Boys

So, the European Championships have ended, I’m back at work, and where am I? Back exactly where I was before I left. GB men got 3rd again, losing 3-2 to France (I got my revenge for my lost luggage!) and I got best 8 again, losing to the winner in the shittest shiai I have done since I started kendo. I was fucking crap, and I’m annoyed.

The trip in and of itself was pretty good. The team result is great and I really felt that we could have beaten the french (with the inevitable “what if?” scenarios), and there was some quality new boy bullying with Theo, which he took like a man.

Theo loves the cock. Especially when it belongs to Alan. We had some surprisingly nice team dou as well. The only problem was that it was initially too small, which ended up producing this novel way of stretching it everyday:

Yes, it is tied to the chair. I really wanted to see if I could use it as some sort of east-end-of-london-post-office-robbing tool set up like that, but sensibility prevailed.

I shared a room with one of the juniors (poor lad) who was extremely quiet in a vaguely scary way. I was afraid of being killed in my sleep, or waking up with a knife in my chest. Thankfully, this wasn’t Saw 4, and I survived without having my skull caved in with my bronze team medal. That thing is meaty, and if wielded with some cold hearted professionalism could do some proper damage.

So, the fighting.

On our first day (the team event) we stormed our group, and the first round, generally owning all either 5-0 or 4-1. In the quarter finals we faced Sweden, who we narrowly beat last year in the last 16. This year was closer still, with 2-2 at the end of my fight, which I drew, for a daihyousen (representatives match), which I took with the second ever hikidou I have scored. Yeah baby. It would be very easy to take the credit having done the fight off, but the real hero of this match was wee Scarface, who produced a truly brilliant 2-0 as fukushou to give me the chance I needed.

After that we had the french. In previous years against these guys we’ve generally come off quite badly (5-0 or 4-1) but this year we were up for a ruck. Sadly, it wasn’t to be, and 3-2 speaks for itself. Whilst still a decent enough result, and one that shows the potential we had, it’s still the small step away from where we could have been. So close!

And then came the individuals. I had been feeling all the way up to this day that it was going to be my day, but on the day itself, I failed.

It would be easy for me to use the excuses presented to me, the most notable of which are the Hachidan who came up to me afterwards and said “If I had been reffing you’d have beaten him….” and the referee who came up to me afterwards to apologise for not stopping the wrestling that lead to my second hansoku, but deep down I know it’s because on the day, I was simply not all there, and knowing that means as much as it would be easy to “blame” outside influences, really, it was just me. And that simply makes it harder.

The worst thing is, the day before in the team taikai, I felt like Zeus. I won an important daihyou sen, I pounded the french taisho, and generally owned, but the day after, despite not being nervous and having had a good nights sleep, I just couldn’t find that extra little bit that I knew I would need to get the win. And whats worse is, I know that I have it too.

It started well enough, in the group (which I won), but went down hill from there, with a 25 minute match in the first round followed by close to 15 in the next. I had drained myself too early, and despite not being really troubled by the next two guys I knew something was up. Why did it take me to beat these first two guys? Because I wanted to win too much. I put so much pressure on myself that the fear of losing in the first or second round ended up stopping me from taking the risks which normally give me ippon. Too many what If’s going around my head for me to see that I was bigger, stronger and faster than the guys I was fighting.

So what next? Weeeeeell, I’ve stuff I want to fix anyway, so now that the big stuff is out of the way for now, I can get on with it (mostly foot work and my kamae), but I also want to find a way to work on my consistency too. That, I feel, is going to be a long and dog shit covered road, but I need to sort it out if I’m going to get anywhere. The quarter finals just isn’t good enough.

Frustrating, and dissapointed.

While searching for pics of the Hoff for that last entry, I came across a couple of beauties:

Guess where I went at the weekend? The clue is in the title.

 Started off on the friday morning going to get my “you are scum and must pay and register to come back” permit from the immigration office, and then headed off to Shin Yokohama station to get the shinkansen to Osaka.

I arrived 2 hours early though, because the immigration office, rather than taking the hour and a half I had been prepared for took a grand total of 5 minutes, when the old lady at the counter announced in Japanese “Is anyone waiting for a re-entry permit only?”. Imagine my surprise when I was the only person in the room (which easily contained at least 50 people) that either

a) wanted a re-entry permit

 or

b) understood japanese…..

Never mind! All good for Gibbo. So, at the station, I purchased myself the pre-requisite (and twice as expensive as it should be) lunch box, completed with deep fried pork:

and set to. And no, I didn’t eat the fake plastic grass. I did once though, back when I didn’t know what it was. I reckon thats an instant foreigner-spotting tool. He’s got the bentou, he’s opened it up, and oooh look! he can use the chop sticks, and he’s put the sauce and and AHA! GOT YOU, YOU FUCKER! YOU ATE THE GRASS! G E T  O U T!!

So, an uneventful few hours later, and I arrive in Osaka, and get to George’s place. Instead of keiko, it’s beers pizza and films, because we’re both knackered. If any of you get a chance to watch a film called SUPERBAD, do, it’s fucking hilarious and also features lines of genius like “I want to be the Andre Agassi of pounding Vag”. Niiiiiice.

Next day and it’s keiko with a couple of Policemen, one of the main reasons for going. The policemen in question this time were Sato, Seike and their kohai Fujita and Maeda. If you don’t know who Sato and Seike are……well I really can’t be arsed to explain. Use google.

This keiko was great, just great, and just what the doctor order 2 weeks before the impending euros. I learned loads, did what I think was for me some pretty good kendo, then got boozed up for the best part of 6 hours with them after that. All good, baby, all good. Amusingly, I also didn’t take ANY pictures of the kendo at all! I think George has some (if you can locate his flickr account, but I can’t be arsed. Do it yourself.)

Next day, we went down to Nanba in central Osaka to go and watch fatties beat the fuck out of each other. No, not a school yard fight at Fat Camp, it was the first day of Sumo’s Osaka Bashou. And all the day tickets were bloody sold out! I was genuinely gutted. Like really annoyed. I was really looking forward to this (I love sumo. Hakuhooooooooooooooo!) and it was going to be one of the highlights of the weekend! So to make up for it, we had lunch instead, and I filled my face with sushi:

I managed a respectable 12 plates. I could quite easily have gone for more, but the chances of becoming extremely tired and sleep after that much fish and rice didn’t appeal, so I stopped there. Good eating though, and all that for a princely 1500yen! Thats right, 7.50! In london that shit would cost you half a months salary!

So, at a loose end we trundled around Osaka, and saw:

A riciulous light up miniature statue of liberty (George reckoned that the thing was bright enough to guide planes in, and must really piss of the people who live in the apartment block RIGHT NEXT TO IT. Nice)

The strangest promotional worker I have ever laid eyes on in my life. I didn’t have the balls to have my picture taken with him. I think he might have killed me.

A large random stone animal. George took roughly ZERO convincing that sitting on it was a good idea, despite it being cordoned off….

Much Billiken. WTF?! And yes, it does say “Things-As-They” on the base. I also don’t know what it’s even vaguely supposed to mean. You are not alone.

The odd example of quality Engrish.

And this fetching helmet. I know, I know, you like what you see huh? It’s ok Wadlow, I always knew you wanted some, just….put it down.

And that was the weekend. All good baby, all good. And just to illustrate how good it was, here is the Hoff to let you know:

At the weekend, I found out that there is a god, and that he resides in the 28 pages of downloadable games on the Wii shopping channel website.

I finally got around to getting a USB Wi-fi adaptor for my little white box of joy, hooked that baby up to the internet, and go straight in there. The first thing I downloaded was this:

Dear lord, am I one happy bunny now. This little beauty is a small slice of gaming history!

I didn’t quite get like this before with my PS2, but I’ve realised that I’ve already accessorised my Wii……First got the machine (obviously) and 3 games and an extra Wii remote. I should have seen this coming looking back at that little haul.

Then for christmas I got a Wii balance board (you stand on it!) and Wii Fit (it rather helpfully pointed out yesterday that I am officially FAT. Cheers then.) and then another game, Resident Evil 4, in the New Year.

Then I bought another game, Puyo Puyo (FOR MY WIFE! Stop laughing!) and things slowed down until I bought the Wifi Connector, 1000 points credit, and a classic controller.

And now I’m in Heaven (note the capital H, thats Important!). I was browsing the 28 pages of downloads available, and in amongst the classics is Legend of Zelda, Street Fighter 2, Gunstar Heroes, Sonic the Hedgehog, Mario 64……..and they are all no more than 1200 yen! I feel a purchase coming on…

I’m such a geek.